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Charita Goshay: Woo-hoo -- it's global warming

Charita Goshay

After 20 years of ridicule, the world has finally stopped snickering at former Vice President Al Gore’s crusade against global warming.

Suddenly, a guy who was regularly flayed for tree-hugging is being treated like an oracle.

For his efforts, Gore was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize last year, as well as an Academy Award for his remarkably un-wonky documentary, “An Inconvenient Truth.”

Because our ecosystem does not operate in a vacuum, if global warming does indeed exist, it threatens every aspect of life on this planet.

But I think I speak this week for Midwesterners everywhere when I say: “Get lost, Al.”

If 60-degree-plus temperatures in January is what’s going to happen as a result of global warming, you’ll be hard-pressed to find anyone in Northeast Ohio yowling very loudly about it.

Quid pro snow

Don’t get us wrong, Al. We aren’t naive. We know that the sight of Ohioans coming to work in shirt-sleeves, or a convertible cruising through town a week after New Year’s Day, goes against nature.

Those of us who have grown up in this region know that sooner or later, weatherwise, we’re going to get whacked like a Sopranos’ mistress.

Somewhere along the way, a pound of flesh will be exacted for the wearing of flip-flops and Harley-riding a mere two weeks after Christmas -- be it an ice storm of biblical proportions or a statewide shortage of Kleenex, thanks to the perpetually runny noses of kids across the Great Lakes.

But cut us a break, big fella. You live in Tennessee, where 2 inches of snow can shut down the state. If Ohio shut down every time we got a “dusting,” we wouldn’t even be a state, we’d be a trading post.

Shoveling out

Only someone who hasn’t tried to navigate a 5,000-pound vehicle while peering through a 6-inch clear patch in the windshield while going sideways would have a problem with temperatures creeping up during the last 50,000 years.

There are some folks, very smart people, for whom global warming remains a fallacy. They claim Gore’s argument is deeply flawed, if not outright politically motivated, and that they can produce reams of scientific evidence and data to the contrary.

They also point out that Gore’s lifestyle, which includes flying around the world to finger-wag about global warming, doesn’t exactly ring “Grizzly Adams,” and that perhaps the only thing more expansive than his energy-sucking mansion in Tennessee is his waistline.

They too, can pipe down. This week, at least, those of us who usually are shoveling out this time of year don’t want to hear from either soapbox. We just want to party like it’s 1999 -- in Miami.

Reach Repository Writer Charita M. Goshay at (330) 580-8313 or e-mail: charita.goshay@cantonrep.com